No Regrets

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If you think that the best way to invite good things in your future is rejecting the bad things from your past, you are sadly mistaken. It is accepting, and even embracing, everything that has happened to you that leads to a better future.

The question I want to ask you is, “Assuming that a wonderful future is coming, what is the basis for this wonderful future?” The answer is: everything that went before, including everything that happened before right now. No matter how bad it’s been, the great future that is coming is built on that. Your past is the base that your future stands on. Not some of your past, all of your past, good and bad. The past and future is one thing, all of a piece. Thus, rejecting any part of your past means rejecting this wonderful future that’s coming. It’s kind of like those time travel movies. If you change anything in the past it changes everything in the future.

But, but, but…I can’t be saying that those bad things were actually good. You’re right. I’m not saying that. If it was bad for you at the time, it was bad for you. That was your experience and your experience is the only one that ultimately counts in your life. I’m also not asking you to reevaluate your judgment about whether something was good or bad for you. That can sometimes prove helpful, but I’m only asking you to adopt one important distinction that is essential to living into a brighter future.

This is the distinction between saying something is okay, and being okay with a not okay thing. I am not saying that losing a job or a loved one is an okay thing. Losing a loved one is not okay, but learning to be okay with what has happened is necessary to moving into a better future. Becoming okay with all the not okay things that have happened to you is essential to inviting your better future that is coming.

I’m inviting you to make peace with your past, to become okay with all of it, what was good and not so good and even horrible. The bonus of making peace with your past in this way is that you get to be at peace right now. I can’t guarantee a particular great future for you. No-one can. But I can promise you that being at peace is a very resourceful state that will maximize your ability in creating your future. And the booby prize –  no matter how things turn out, you get to feel good all along the way, and the way never ends.

 

 

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