Taking Time To Notice

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Recently, I put in an application for a new life insurance policy. It’s been a while since I’ve heard anything and I’m due to make a payment on my present policy that I don’t want to make, because I don’t want to pay for double coverage. But if something doesn’t happen soon, I’ll have to make the payment. After calling my agent and her call to the underwriter, her return call to me, and my call to my doctor, I discovered that my doctor had no record of the underwriter’s faxed request for my records. This was what was holding things up.

Well, we got it all straightened out with a few more calls, and I returned to meditating which had been pre-empted by my agent’s call to me. As I settled in I noticed that I was feeling agitated and out of sorts. Sitting and focusing on my breathing, I realized that I was feeling agitated because I had spent time and energy dealing with something that I hadn’t anticipated in what already promised to be a busy day.

So that’s the first topic. It’s interesting how I can take a really small thing and let it get to me. My mind tends to organize my life, make plans, that if they get interrupted in some way is almost always a reason for me to feel bad, if even only a little bit. It reminds me of the saying, “humans make plans, and gods laugh.”  All these decades of unexpected and unplanned happenings and I still have this habit of feeling bad when things don’t turn out. Fortunately, I can step back and usually be amused by my imperfect ways.

After realizing why I was feeling out of sorts, I was able to use the first few minutes of my sitting to love the part of me that was feeling agitated and out of sorts, and it subsided easily. But here’s my next topic. I feel blessed that I have a practice of sitting every day, so that I can notice what’s happening. I suspect that if I didn’t take these pauses to just sit, watch my breath and my thoughts slowing down, I would be a lot more out of sorts a lot more of the time.

I encourage you to create space in your life, at least a little every day to step back from being caught up in all the busyness of your life. This will provide opportunity for you to practice loving yourself and others and help you be in a more resourceful place, so you’ll probably get a lot more done in a little less time. Thanks for your attention.

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